Now a days you can get your product from many different types of people. Here are 9 types of weed providers you’ve probably dealt with. Hell, you might even be one yourself 😉
1. The Business Hippie
These guys are the offspring of the hippies of old. These stingy peoples are indirectly responsible for the recession and are always trying to start a legal business to clean their money which is usually their downfall.
Their kids are hipsters. It is a never ending cycle.
2. The Magician
This guy always has the best shit and the oddest group of friends. His network provides him with a bevy of perks and connections. He is always the last guy you think would sell weed.
Their retirement plan is non existent.
3. The Mystery Man
This one is either hit or miss. Coming up with unbelievable shit or actual shit. Inconsistency keeps us away from him. Tends to always have odd jobs outside of selling.
Actually sold us bermuda grass because he was dry and needed the money.
4. The Aficionado
This person is all about the reputation. Sells the Grade A stuff for Grade A prices. When you can afford it this is the best bang for the buck.
The first person you knew with a vaporizer.
5. The Caregiver
This person uses weed strictly for medical use. They’re high on the job and cite some odd medical reason to do so. These people are most likely to be advocates for legalization.
Dreams of owning a dispensary.
6. The Unreliable
Always just sold the shit you were going to buy or never returns your calls. Also tried to peer pressure you into buying more than you can afford. His excuse for not re-uping is that he didn’t have a ride.
His prices vary from day to day for the same shit.
7. The Pincher
This person tries their hardest to give you what looks like a gram but is much less. We call their social disorder “Crab Hands” because they pinch. They still try and make you feel like you are somehow getting a great deal and that everything is all good.
How you feel after dealing with a pincher.
8. The Foreign Guy
You can barely understand him but his shit is always different and not always in a good way. Usually slips in some hash and other illegal shit.
At some point might ask you to smuggle something for him.
9. The Gangster
While the product may be decent the hassle and risk is not. Inviting at first but when shit pops off you’re automatically a suspect, witness, or victim whether you like it or not.
Violence is their answer to all problems.
Who are some of the weed providers you’ve dealt with? (Ay ay no dealin’ or advertising in the comments yeah?)